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Monkey Picked Tea



Everyone loves a good old cup of Rosie Lee, but there are times when bog standard builder's tea simply won't do. The only problem is, unless you've got a double-barrelled name and your palate is as pretentious as your hyphen, wimpy brews like Earl Grey and Darjeeling just don't hit the spot. What's more, posh tea is hardly likely to get your guests in a lather of excitement.

Monkey Picked Tea is a wonderfully refreshing brew that has been hand - or rather paw - picked by monkeys! That's right. These well cared for monkeys are famous in their native China and are specially trained by their owners to pick rare, wild tea plants in inaccessible places, such as cliff faces. The monkey-picked leaves produce a pale, golden tea that's so fragrant and delicious it's best served without milk. Or sugar. Or biscuits. Or cake. The point being, drinking Monkey Tea should be viewed as an important spiritual event, not to be sullied by crass diversions.

And let's face it, scurrying around in the great outdoors harvesting Asia's favourite drink is a far more dignified way to earn a living than prancing around on a barrel-organ in a grubby, ill-fitting clown's suit.
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